A lot of marriage failed because couples do not take responsibility for the role that they play in a relationship. Very often, blaming the other instead of oneself become the favourite pastime of couples and when there are conflicts, they choose the most convenient mean - walking away instead of trying to save the marriage!
Apparently these couples have short term memories because they are the same individuals who have vowed to support and to love each other through thick and thin! However, divorce has now become an easy way out for people who do not have the courage to salvage what deserves to be salvaged. When couples go through a divorce, they channel all their energies into accusing each other of causing hurt and disharmony in the marriage. They forget that in the process, their children are the ones most deeply hurt! If they have channeled their energies to save the marriage, more than one human being is saved!
So is it possible to save your marriage? Yes, if you had loved each other in the first place, you will definitely be able to rekindle the love and here are 3 ways in which you can save your marriage.
1. Share financial responsibilities Many married couples forget that it takes two hands to clap so now that they are married, both party should be responsible for the family financially. Being married means you are united as one so you should shoulder the burden of raising a family together.
Find out each others' spending style and come to a compromise on how best you can save and at the same time not have to sting on yourself. Spend some time to prioritize what is important to you and to your family, especially if you have children. You need to come to a mutual agreement on how you can divide out the burden of financial responsibility.
2. Never go to bed angry I strongly believe that this is very sound advice to building a lasting relationship because you and your spouse are two very different individuals so there are bound to be conflicts. The important point is that you must find ways to resolve those conflicts. By all means take time off to cool down but after a storm, both of you have to sit down and discuss the issue together. You have to listen to each other and find a solution or come to a compromise but never leave the fight overnight.
It is very unhealthy to go to bed angry and you will only cause a drift in the relationship if you do not try to resolve your problem first. After which, you should forget about the fight and make up for it in bed. It is vital to forget about the problem after the fight had been resolved if you want to save your marriage.
3. Plan time for romance Many married couples forget to plan a time for romance, especially if they have children. In order for a marriage to last long, it is important not to forget to spend time to be intimate. Marriage is not the end of romance, it is the start of a whole new life together. If you sense that something is not right in your relationship, you need to make time for each other so that you can save your marriage.
People are constantly busy nowadays so if you do not find time for your spouse so as to rekindle the love in your relationship, it will hit trouble. It is definitely not worthwhile to spend all your time carving out a career for your family only to discover that you have lost your marriage in the end!
The above are just 3 of the 15 tips in the ebook "15 Steps Towards Improving Your Marriage". Simply apply the strategies in the ebook which you can download immediately and you are on your way to saving your marriage. Don't wait till it's too late to start saving your marriage. You deserve a better life than the present agony and suffering that you are going through. If you have children, you must remember that you are not suffering alone! You do not want your failed marriage to affect your children's psychological development! Seeking the right advice from the right people will help you to save your marriage and start life afresh with your spouse. All you have to do is to take action now and log on to Stella's website at http://www.stellamak.com/recommend/savemarriagetips.html.
You can also grab your 10 ecourse on "Discover the tips to saving your marriage" on Stella's blog at http://www.savemarriage.expertreviewslist.com.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Stella_Mak
Friday, 26 June 2009
Wednesday, 24 June 2009
Can Long Distance Relationships Really Work?
The answer is a resounding "YES!"
I've received thousands of letters from people throughout the world who conquered distance in their relationships and now live happily ever after!
Shortly after I graduated from school, I experienced a long distance relationship. After graduation, I discovered that there were no relationship help or relationship advice books written on long distance love & relationships, overcoming long distance, relationship problems in long distance relationships, long distance romance, marriages or dating ...
Even though millions of people like me were going through the same thing!
Everyone told me my relationship couldn't work ...but that's not true...and I wanted to share that with other couples
There are things that youcan do to LOVE your long distance relationship!
Distance is not the end of the world in a relationship
Distance cannot, and will not hurt a bond between two people that is based on mutual respect, trust, commitment, and love.
Although you may feel like you are losing faith in your relationship at times, hold fast and trust your heart!
I, like you, truly believe that love & relationships are what make your life special, and that ones built on love & understanding are always worth preserving, regardless of the miles that may separate two people.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
All across the world, there are couples just like you who are crazy about each other but are forced by circumstance to live apart...
University students try to concentrate while writing love letters on the Internet to "hometown honeys"...
Executives climb the corporate ladder while their true love waits for their call hundreds of miles away...
Members of our armed forces who protect freedom worldwide...
New lovers who meet while browsing online dating communities ...
Even Hollywood stars, who must sustain love & relationships and marriages while making movies in different countries...
Commuter marriages, online dating, bicoastal romance, long distance love on the Internet...
The fact is that more than 10 million couples worldwide are coping with long distance relationships ... and that number is increasing daily!
In the Loving Your Long Distance Relationship series you'll find valuable relationship advice and discover the secrets to keeping love hot, avoiding relationship problems, and escaping temptation
_________________________________________________
I loved reading your book! Do you know that I started crying once I began reading your introduction? It described my emotions to a "T"Mayra, California, USA
I loved your book, thank you soooooo much! You helped me to believe that I'm going to have a future with my long-distance relationship.Chiara, Milano, Italy
_________________________________________________
Inside Loving Your Long Distance Relationship you'll find relationship help, relationship advice, & tips on ...
How to cope with saying goodbye again and again
The emotional stages of a long distance relationship
Ways to combat out-of-sight / out-of-mind temptations
The key to preventing phone arguments
Fascinating stories of people living apart & making it work
How living apart can actually strengthen a relationship
Why long distance love is different for Women versus Men
Warning signs that your relationship may be ending
After reading Loving Your Long Distance Relationship you'll be able to avoid potential relationship problems ...and realize how easy it is to stay together while you're apart from the one you love
Need a copy of this great e-Book, go to: - http://tinyurl.com/mpsa5c
I've received thousands of letters from people throughout the world who conquered distance in their relationships and now live happily ever after!
Shortly after I graduated from school, I experienced a long distance relationship. After graduation, I discovered that there were no relationship help or relationship advice books written on long distance love & relationships, overcoming long distance, relationship problems in long distance relationships, long distance romance, marriages or dating ...
Even though millions of people like me were going through the same thing!
Everyone told me my relationship couldn't work ...but that's not true...and I wanted to share that with other couples
There are things that youcan do to LOVE your long distance relationship!
Distance is not the end of the world in a relationship
Distance cannot, and will not hurt a bond between two people that is based on mutual respect, trust, commitment, and love.
Although you may feel like you are losing faith in your relationship at times, hold fast and trust your heart!
I, like you, truly believe that love & relationships are what make your life special, and that ones built on love & understanding are always worth preserving, regardless of the miles that may separate two people.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
All across the world, there are couples just like you who are crazy about each other but are forced by circumstance to live apart...
University students try to concentrate while writing love letters on the Internet to "hometown honeys"...
Executives climb the corporate ladder while their true love waits for their call hundreds of miles away...
Members of our armed forces who protect freedom worldwide...
New lovers who meet while browsing online dating communities ...
Even Hollywood stars, who must sustain love & relationships and marriages while making movies in different countries...
Commuter marriages, online dating, bicoastal romance, long distance love on the Internet...
The fact is that more than 10 million couples worldwide are coping with long distance relationships ... and that number is increasing daily!
In the Loving Your Long Distance Relationship series you'll find valuable relationship advice and discover the secrets to keeping love hot, avoiding relationship problems, and escaping temptation
_________________________________________________
I loved reading your book! Do you know that I started crying once I began reading your introduction? It described my emotions to a "T"Mayra, California, USA
I loved your book, thank you soooooo much! You helped me to believe that I'm going to have a future with my long-distance relationship.Chiara, Milano, Italy
_________________________________________________
Inside Loving Your Long Distance Relationship you'll find relationship help, relationship advice, & tips on ...
How to cope with saying goodbye again and again
The emotional stages of a long distance relationship
Ways to combat out-of-sight / out-of-mind temptations
The key to preventing phone arguments
Fascinating stories of people living apart & making it work
How living apart can actually strengthen a relationship
Why long distance love is different for Women versus Men
Warning signs that your relationship may be ending
After reading Loving Your Long Distance Relationship you'll be able to avoid potential relationship problems ...and realize how easy it is to stay together while you're apart from the one you love
Need a copy of this great e-Book, go to: - http://tinyurl.com/mpsa5c
Fix Your Troubled Marriage!
Are you living in a troubled marriage? Are you bummed, because your marriage is not that perfect marriage you visualized for you and your partner? We are going to tell you something you should know, but if you don't, you are not alone। There is no such thing as a perfect marriage। Well, maybe on television, but not in real life. While there are no perfect marriages, there are lots of troubled marriages. That's probably not a great deal of help to you; unless it makes you feel better that you are not alone.
There are several issues that can help give rise to problems in a marriage। A vast majority of the big problems faced in a troubled marriage are because one or a number of little problems, have not been dealt with so they got significantly bigger। It can be explained by the famous line from the movie, Cool Hand Luke with Paul Newman। "What we've got here is a failure to communicate." By not communicating, the partners in the marriage allow an issue to fester and grow until it becomes big enough to lead to a troubled marriage.
You have to face it, communication in a marriage is like the oxygen you need for breathing। If oxygen is removed from a fire, it goes out. Maybe that is what happened to the passion in your marriage. If a person stops breathing, they need CPR or they die. If couples stop communicating, it is the marriage that needs resuscitation. Without it, you can't expect to save your marriage and it will die.
If you find yourself in this situation, you need to get realistic। Accept the truth that there is no perfect marriage and that the responsibility to open a line of communication with your partner rests with you. There is really no upside to a competition between partners based on the "cold shoulder" method of communication and this can be a common marriage problem. If you are not willing to be the first one to speak but then blame your partner for not talking to you, think about it, that's just plain crazy!
Once you get realistic and become responsible for the sharing and communication necessary to deal with the issues in your troubled marriage, you well be helping to resuscitate and hopefully, save your marriage। Once the line of communication is open, each partner must be willing to help identify and recognize the things that are troubling the marriage.
After each partner has shared their communication around the issues they see as marriage problems, then both partners have to start the work to identify what can be done to fix that problem in your marriage। This is where the most critical step to saving your troubled marriage comes in to the mix. You are actually sharing solutions you see that can save your marriage and it is so important simply because it is not easy.
This critical step is about getting agreements। No solution is worth even a dime if both partners can't agree that it is in fact, a solution. Take the time to get firm agreement because if one of you isn't truly committed to this solution, you do not have an agreement! When an agreement is reached, you have come to the most important step. Write It Down! Once you have the list of agreements, make a copy for each partner. One of your agreements should be that each of you will put it in a prominent place where they will see it on a regular basis and that you will come together regularly to review it over an agreed on period of time.
While finding a solution like developing firm agreements, can be a very difficult task, it is of immediate and critical importance that you be willing to secure the tools and resources that can support you in saving your marriage। Fortunately Amy Waterman and Richard Wheeler have created a step by step guide for you to follow and save your marriage. Their program has several tools and activities, like agreement sharing, that will help you save your marriage right now.
This guide is called Save My Marriage Today, and it has all the techniques necessary to enable you to facilitate resolving conflicts, increase self esteem, learn about forgiveness, and re-ignite the passion that you both once felt, all within the privacy and comfort of your own home. Save yourself the time and embarrassment of explaining it all to a counselor. Get the answers to your most urgent issues right now! You are the best one to save your marriage. Let us show you how. It may be the best advice you have ever had!
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Carol_Ann_James
There are several issues that can help give rise to problems in a marriage। A vast majority of the big problems faced in a troubled marriage are because one or a number of little problems, have not been dealt with so they got significantly bigger। It can be explained by the famous line from the movie, Cool Hand Luke with Paul Newman। "What we've got here is a failure to communicate." By not communicating, the partners in the marriage allow an issue to fester and grow until it becomes big enough to lead to a troubled marriage.
You have to face it, communication in a marriage is like the oxygen you need for breathing। If oxygen is removed from a fire, it goes out. Maybe that is what happened to the passion in your marriage. If a person stops breathing, they need CPR or they die. If couples stop communicating, it is the marriage that needs resuscitation. Without it, you can't expect to save your marriage and it will die.
If you find yourself in this situation, you need to get realistic। Accept the truth that there is no perfect marriage and that the responsibility to open a line of communication with your partner rests with you. There is really no upside to a competition between partners based on the "cold shoulder" method of communication and this can be a common marriage problem. If you are not willing to be the first one to speak but then blame your partner for not talking to you, think about it, that's just plain crazy!
Once you get realistic and become responsible for the sharing and communication necessary to deal with the issues in your troubled marriage, you well be helping to resuscitate and hopefully, save your marriage। Once the line of communication is open, each partner must be willing to help identify and recognize the things that are troubling the marriage.
After each partner has shared their communication around the issues they see as marriage problems, then both partners have to start the work to identify what can be done to fix that problem in your marriage। This is where the most critical step to saving your troubled marriage comes in to the mix. You are actually sharing solutions you see that can save your marriage and it is so important simply because it is not easy.
This critical step is about getting agreements। No solution is worth even a dime if both partners can't agree that it is in fact, a solution. Take the time to get firm agreement because if one of you isn't truly committed to this solution, you do not have an agreement! When an agreement is reached, you have come to the most important step. Write It Down! Once you have the list of agreements, make a copy for each partner. One of your agreements should be that each of you will put it in a prominent place where they will see it on a regular basis and that you will come together regularly to review it over an agreed on period of time.
While finding a solution like developing firm agreements, can be a very difficult task, it is of immediate and critical importance that you be willing to secure the tools and resources that can support you in saving your marriage। Fortunately Amy Waterman and Richard Wheeler have created a step by step guide for you to follow and save your marriage. Their program has several tools and activities, like agreement sharing, that will help you save your marriage right now.
This guide is called Save My Marriage Today, and it has all the techniques necessary to enable you to facilitate resolving conflicts, increase self esteem, learn about forgiveness, and re-ignite the passion that you both once felt, all within the privacy and comfort of your own home. Save yourself the time and embarrassment of explaining it all to a counselor. Get the answers to your most urgent issues right now! You are the best one to save your marriage. Let us show you how. It may be the best advice you have ever had!
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Carol_Ann_James
Saturday, 20 June 2009
The 100% Solution To Marriage Bliss
So often we hear the statistic - "more than half of all marriages end in divorce". And, it is true. But, why? Does it have to be this way? No, there is a way of escaping it.
The 100% Solution is how to escape being one of the 50% that end in divorce.
We have also heard - "marriage is a 50-50 proposition". Really? In fact, successful marriages are a 100-100 proposition. This means I accept my mate 100% and she accepts me 100%. We allow the person on the inside to be the person on the outside, completely exposed. Absolutely nothing is hidden. Nothing is kept secret. No walls between us. No manipulation. And, most of all, No Expectations of certain behavior. The 50-50 solution implies you and your mate are holding back 50% from the relationship. This doesn't work - ever.
But, you might say - "you don't know what he/she had done to me", "he/she is a liar", "I can't trust him/her". May I boldly say - "Get over it". If you want your marriage to prosper, you must put away the past and start fresh because, honestly, you aren't perfect either. No one is the perfect wife or perfect husband or perfect mate. No one is without "sin", so-to-speak. No one does everything perfectly in relationships. Now, this does NOT mean you stay with a mate who is physically or emotionally abusing you. Do not be anyone's punching bag. Get away as fast as you can and get help.
How do I know The 100% Solution works? My wife and I have lived the 50-50 solution and we both ended in divorce from our former mates. When we married each other we had some rough spots in the beginning because we both were playing by the old 50-50 solution. Then we discovered The 100% Solution. We have been happily living The 100% Solution for over 10 years with no stress in our marriage and no arguments. When we don't agree on a course of action, we don't do it. It's simple. Why do something your partner doesn't agree with? Why create stress? Support your partner 100% and they will support you.
So, what exactly is The 100% Solution? First, I will give it to you and then tell you where we found it. As you read it, you just might recognize it. Here it is.
1) Love is patient.
2) Love is kind.
3) Love does not envy and is not pretentious. It is not ambitious or self seeking.
4) Love bears with all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.
5) Love keeps no record of wrongs - it does not delight in evil, but rejoices in truth.
6) Love is the eternal tie that binds us.
And we have added - Love never criticizes, condemns, or complains.
Do you recognize it? We found The 100% Solution in the Bible in 1st Corinthians - Chapter 13. We have been living it successfully because we determined to put the past behind us and create a new future - together.
If you are not interested in the Bible, another helpful resource is the book - "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" by John Gray, PhD. We read this book together and discovered a few little personality quirks we were not aware of. It was a great help. You can get it from any major bookstore and on-line.
Try The 100% Solution and we know your marriage will be bliss.
Published At: Isnare Free Articles Directory http://www.isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=77140&ca=Marriage
The 100% Solution is how to escape being one of the 50% that end in divorce.
We have also heard - "marriage is a 50-50 proposition". Really? In fact, successful marriages are a 100-100 proposition. This means I accept my mate 100% and she accepts me 100%. We allow the person on the inside to be the person on the outside, completely exposed. Absolutely nothing is hidden. Nothing is kept secret. No walls between us. No manipulation. And, most of all, No Expectations of certain behavior. The 50-50 solution implies you and your mate are holding back 50% from the relationship. This doesn't work - ever.
But, you might say - "you don't know what he/she had done to me", "he/she is a liar", "I can't trust him/her". May I boldly say - "Get over it". If you want your marriage to prosper, you must put away the past and start fresh because, honestly, you aren't perfect either. No one is the perfect wife or perfect husband or perfect mate. No one is without "sin", so-to-speak. No one does everything perfectly in relationships. Now, this does NOT mean you stay with a mate who is physically or emotionally abusing you. Do not be anyone's punching bag. Get away as fast as you can and get help.
How do I know The 100% Solution works? My wife and I have lived the 50-50 solution and we both ended in divorce from our former mates. When we married each other we had some rough spots in the beginning because we both were playing by the old 50-50 solution. Then we discovered The 100% Solution. We have been happily living The 100% Solution for over 10 years with no stress in our marriage and no arguments. When we don't agree on a course of action, we don't do it. It's simple. Why do something your partner doesn't agree with? Why create stress? Support your partner 100% and they will support you.
So, what exactly is The 100% Solution? First, I will give it to you and then tell you where we found it. As you read it, you just might recognize it. Here it is.
1) Love is patient.
2) Love is kind.
3) Love does not envy and is not pretentious. It is not ambitious or self seeking.
4) Love bears with all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.
5) Love keeps no record of wrongs - it does not delight in evil, but rejoices in truth.
6) Love is the eternal tie that binds us.
And we have added - Love never criticizes, condemns, or complains.
Do you recognize it? We found The 100% Solution in the Bible in 1st Corinthians - Chapter 13. We have been living it successfully because we determined to put the past behind us and create a new future - together.
If you are not interested in the Bible, another helpful resource is the book - "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" by John Gray, PhD. We read this book together and discovered a few little personality quirks we were not aware of. It was a great help. You can get it from any major bookstore and on-line.
Try The 100% Solution and we know your marriage will be bliss.
Published At: Isnare Free Articles Directory http://www.isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=77140&ca=Marriage
5 Loving Actions That Will Keep Your Love ALIVE!
It's no secret that modern life is fast-paced and getting faster every day. In this world, relationships and all the work they require can easily be seen as inefficient, time-consuming and simply not gratifying enough. For your relationship to have a healthy chance at survival, you must take steps to nurture the simple, loving aspects of your union.
5 actions that are essential for your relationship:
1. Hellos and good-byes
Greeting your partner and saying good-bye are quick and easy to do but often overlooked in the chaos of hectic schedules. A warm, expressive greeting can set the stage for the entire day. An affectionate good-bye allows you and your partner to emotionally hold on to loving feelings while separated from each other. you'd be surprised how often couples skip this simple way to book-end their days. It may seem easier to put all your morning energies into catching the 7:15 train and overlook taking the time to stop, make eye contact with your partner and genuinely wish him/her a good day. Dont fall into this trap.
2. Share the trivialities of life
Think back to a time when your relationship was new. What did you and your partner talk about? Probably anything and everything. The excitement of new love propels us to share even the smallest details of our day. Unfortunately that level of sharing often dwindles as relationships mature and responsibilities mount. Focus on the act of sharing to refuel intimacy. The simple act itself is more important than the specifics of what is shared. So make it a habit to share the trivialities of your day with your partner.
3. Learn to laugh together
Shared laughter is a surefire way to keep the connection with your partner vibrant. When you laugh, you're tapping into the playful energy that transcends life's stresses. When you and your partner make each other laugh, this energy feeds intimacy and life becomes a little less daunting. Make time for mutual playfulness and make fun of life's absurdities this will help you both cope with stress, develop perspective and achieve a greater sense of togetherness.
4. Communicate through Touch
Touch is a powerful way to communicate affection and foster intimacy. Whether you�re sitting across from each other at the dinner table or next to your partner on the sofa, make the effort to increase the amount you touch one another. Touch also has a calming effect on our bodies, so if you want to create a relaxed, loving atmosphere and make your partner feel special, lean into each other the next time you�re at the movies or watching TV.
5. Show your appreciation
It's human nature to want to be recognized for the things we do. When you express gratitude, your partner receives the message that you are thankful and are not taking him/her for granted. An atmosphere of appreciation will create positive feelings and deepen your connection. Don�t fall prey to the expectation-mindset, where you start to believe that your partner is supposed to do all the things s/he does and therefore doesnt need to be thanked for themthis mindset creates a dangerous atmosphere of complacency that erodes intimacy.
These five loving acts dont take much time and dont cost a dime but the payoff is huge. You will be taking steps to protect your marriage or relationship from the fast-paced tempo of life.
Published At: Isnare Free Articles Directory http://www.isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=204197&ca=Marriage
5 actions that are essential for your relationship:
1. Hellos and good-byes
Greeting your partner and saying good-bye are quick and easy to do but often overlooked in the chaos of hectic schedules. A warm, expressive greeting can set the stage for the entire day. An affectionate good-bye allows you and your partner to emotionally hold on to loving feelings while separated from each other. you'd be surprised how often couples skip this simple way to book-end their days. It may seem easier to put all your morning energies into catching the 7:15 train and overlook taking the time to stop, make eye contact with your partner and genuinely wish him/her a good day. Dont fall into this trap.
2. Share the trivialities of life
Think back to a time when your relationship was new. What did you and your partner talk about? Probably anything and everything. The excitement of new love propels us to share even the smallest details of our day. Unfortunately that level of sharing often dwindles as relationships mature and responsibilities mount. Focus on the act of sharing to refuel intimacy. The simple act itself is more important than the specifics of what is shared. So make it a habit to share the trivialities of your day with your partner.
3. Learn to laugh together
Shared laughter is a surefire way to keep the connection with your partner vibrant. When you laugh, you're tapping into the playful energy that transcends life's stresses. When you and your partner make each other laugh, this energy feeds intimacy and life becomes a little less daunting. Make time for mutual playfulness and make fun of life's absurdities this will help you both cope with stress, develop perspective and achieve a greater sense of togetherness.
4. Communicate through Touch
Touch is a powerful way to communicate affection and foster intimacy. Whether you�re sitting across from each other at the dinner table or next to your partner on the sofa, make the effort to increase the amount you touch one another. Touch also has a calming effect on our bodies, so if you want to create a relaxed, loving atmosphere and make your partner feel special, lean into each other the next time you�re at the movies or watching TV.
5. Show your appreciation
It's human nature to want to be recognized for the things we do. When you express gratitude, your partner receives the message that you are thankful and are not taking him/her for granted. An atmosphere of appreciation will create positive feelings and deepen your connection. Don�t fall prey to the expectation-mindset, where you start to believe that your partner is supposed to do all the things s/he does and therefore doesnt need to be thanked for themthis mindset creates a dangerous atmosphere of complacency that erodes intimacy.
These five loving acts dont take much time and dont cost a dime but the payoff is huge. You will be taking steps to protect your marriage or relationship from the fast-paced tempo of life.
Published At: Isnare Free Articles Directory http://www.isnare.comPermanent Link: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=204197&ca=Marriage
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
